So I was going to have this post up, like 3 hours ago. After finishing some other client work and before getting a head start on some stuff for next week and generally being the epitome of awesomely productive.
But then I got home from yoga, started some water boiling for tea (because it’s FINALLY BELOW 80 DEGREES AND I AM SO HAPPY), got out a couple of eggs…and looked down at my kitchen floor and saw the maggots everywhere.
Yes. Maggots. Tiny squirmy wormlike little buggers. ALL OVER MY KITCHEN FLOOR.
Let me just say that Husband and I are not in the habit of leaving out rotting meat or dead bodies or anything that would’ve been an obvious place for flies to lay eggs. I took out the trash and thoroughly inspected the trash can and couldn’t find anything in there. I poured bleach down the sink and garbage disposal (which is literally brand new). Raid, Windex, and bleach were largely ineffective at killing them, leaving me to crawl all over the kitchen floor squishing and killing all that I could find. (I also set up a barricade to keep Onyx away from any leftover maggots and the potentially toxic residue from the cleaners.)
I still have no idea where they’re coming from, but I suspect it’s either something in the walls somewhere (ugh, gross, yuck) or in unit next to ours (which has been empty for several months, but someone is moving in soon so people have been in cleaning this week…so may have disturbed or chased them over here?)
Anyway, I’ve basically given up on accomplishing more than what’s absolutely necessary, I’m sitting on the couch watching How I Met Your Mother re-runs, and I’m scared to go in the kitchen to see if any more have gotten out. Which brings me to…
5 Things That Completely Gross Me Out
1 | maggots
Obviously. God, I’m going to have nightmares about those fuckers now.
2 | pulling hair out of the shower drain
Disgusting. Somehow being in the drain makes hair all slimy and gunky.
3 | that tupperware container that’s been in the refrigerator for 6 months
You know what? I’m just gonna toss it as is. There’s no telling what might escape if I open that thing. And tupperware (or ziploc or whatever the brand is) is pretty cheap.
4 | changing baby diapers
Confession: I’ve never actually done this. I’ve been in the vicinity of it happening, though, and ew.
5 | oysters
I’m sorry, but you want me to voluntarily pay to eat a giant slimy booger? Thanks but no thanks.
And no pictures because I didn’t really want to take any photos of the infestation, nor did I think you’d want to see any before starting your weekend.