Ugh, guys. The marathon is less than two weeks away and I do not feel good about it at all. Between various trips from Thanksgiving to New Year’s and getting sick in the middle of December, I barely completed any long runs or pace workouts and all my motivation went whoosh. (Especially after I started entertaining thoughts of running crazy-fast 5Ks and wishing I was on a track instead of plodding around Mission Bay.)
In short: I’ll still be running 26.2 miles in Carlsbad on January 18th. I have absolutely no idea how it’ll turn out. I
think really hope that breaking four hours is still possible. I hope I’ll be happy with whatever result I get. I know I’ll be relieved to close this chapter and turn to the next one (quarters on the track alllll day). But I have a sneaking suspicion that if my finish time starts with 4:xx:xx, I’ll be really upset with myself and maybe even vowing to run another marathon for some sort of “vengeance” or whatever. And as of right now, I do not want to run another marathon (seriously, I barely even want to run this one).
I don’t mean to sound all negative and whiny. I’m proud of myself for sticking to this commitment as best as I could — but my “best” wasn’t very good, at least in December. I couldn’t do anything about getting sick, but traveling for Thanksgiving, my brother’s graduation, and Christmas? I should’ve worked around them. I had the best intentions of doing so — but didn’t follow through. Really, the best move I could’ve made would have been to…not pick a marathon where my training would peak over the holidays. Dur.
And even before reaching the starting line, I’ve learned a lot from this race. Like that vanilla Powerade gel is surprisingly tasty but the blueberry-pomegranate Gu gel is absolutely disgusting. So at least I’ve got that going for me.